I've been very fortunate in many ways, and I've had a hard life too.
One way I've been fortunate is in my profession. I've been a practicing clinical psychologist since the 1980's. A couple of specifics - I went to Hahnemann Medical College in Philadelphia for my Master's and Doctoral degrees. Prior to that, I went to American University in Washington, DC for my undergraduate degree. I've been licensed in New Jersey since 1982, Pennsylvania since 1983. When I moved to New Mexico, I got licensed in this state, and also in Arizona.
So, in addition to twelve years of education and training, I've been practicing for another forty years. This means I've developed immense knowledge and wisdom about how to best help people.
Although I've had a lot in common with other psychologists, I have always felt different too. I felt that I was marching to a different drummer, that's one way to say it. I've always been a pretty down-to-earth and highly respectful person. And, I have always been somewhat different from my colleagues, my fellow psychologists. Although I've had aspects of myself that were pretty straight-laced (an old term that still has meaning), I've been looser than the others. I've continued to loosen up a lot, which is a source of joy and warmth.
People frequently tell me that my voice is very calming and soothing, that they feel more peaceful just hearing my voice. That has been a gift, not something I ever worked on. I was very fortunate - during my college years the psychology course work came easily to me, I was interested in it right away, and kept being interested as I pursued it further. I had images in my mind of being in an office, seeing people and helping people. I had a strong feeling then that that was what I wanted. I have enjoyed doing it for a long time now, and the enjoyment grows as my skills continue to deepen.
Yes, I have a life outside the office, a life that includes joy and fun times. The Phillies are a stretch right now, but when I was still living near Philly, I loved going to see them live - we get to see that millionaires struggle with themselves too! We see their frustration, their conflicts, their self-esteem struggles and their enjoyment of the game.
My personal difficulties have meant that I've sought help for myself, many times over the years. Being in the "other" chair has helped me in my life and in my understanding, a deeper understanding, of the issues we all confront. This has helped my ability to connect, to be compassionate, to help others.
I've been doing it so long now that I've had the incredible pleasure of seeing grown children of people I worked with when they were younger. This feels wonderful. I know, really know, where they are coming from. I don't get to do this very often and treasure the opportunity when it does happen.
I am highly respectful of my clients. I take my time, I listen carefully, I ask meaningful questions. My questions are meant to gain more information and also to help you think about yourself and your thoughts, feelings, purpose more clearly. I don't take calls while I'm working with a client - you have my undivided attention.
LIFE IS HARD? In many parts of our culture, it's not ok to acknowledge that life is hard.
But it is, it's very hard.
Have you ever seen a doctor who was willing to admit that he or she didn't know something? Didn't it make you respect that person a lot more? Compare that to consulting with someone who pretended to know, or who lectured you about something you already know about. Who would you prefer to work with, especially when it's your life, your health, your body or your soul?
When we life life to the fullest, we feel a lot of pain and discomfort, as well as passion and joy. Becoming able to say these difficult things is one of the singular struggles we share. Of course, there are people who say things more easily, sometimes well, often not well at all.
Becoming more comfortable with not knowing what to say, how to say it, what to do, etc., etc., is essential. Confronting and being able to not know things is the bottom line, when we are becoming more of who we really are - human!
I've been consciously growing and evolving as a human being for a long time, and I'm just getting better at it! I would be delighted to serve as a support and guide for you in your human journey.
When you are ready to work with me, or if you have questions ~ call me 609 841 9159
It's a difficult step to take, to reach out, look for, and contact - a professional to go talk with about your personal issues. Having a warm, supportive therapist who is separate from the rest of your life can make a big difference.
““Dr. Vicki is an excellent doctor. She has helped me turn corners that I thought were impossible. She helps you discover things about yourself that you never knew existed. She makes me feel like it is not just a job to her. She genuinely cares about your well being. I would recommend her to anyone who is thinking about exploring therapy.””
““Dr. Handfield really listens. My sessions are filled with honesty, compassion, and realistic goals for the future. I always feel better after a session with her.””
““Dr. Vicki is a true professional in how she approaches life’s issues. Her ability to create a comfortable setting in which to discuss issues is very comforting. She has been specifically helpful in defining issues and framing a course of action. I feel that she is extremely truthful, and provides a good foundation for making improvements. The experience has been extremely beneficial.””
““Dr. Vicki Handfield has helped me tremendously! Every session is valuable to me. I always learn something about myself or take away an action item.””
