Does your relationship need some help? Some fine tuning or an overhaul? I enjoy helping couples who are struggling to resolve their differences and re-ignite their love. All couples have difficult times, arguments, volcanic eruptions (even if not out loud) - hard times that make each of them wonder if they will actually make it together.
Many people stay together "for the sake of the children", or because they really don't want to have to go out into dating land again; but they are horribly unhappy most of the time. People in these marriages numb out, stay in their own orbits, have superficial relationships and deny they are unhappy. Then something happens - cheating. Sometimes people seek help when they realize they are on the brink of cheating - and it's great that they reach out before it's too late. Some couples do overcome the damage done by cheating, but not many.
There are healthy elements and unhealthy dynamics in every relationship - I can help you sort out which is which - it's can be hard to tell. While there are many common aspects to relationship issues, they are all unique too. You and your significant other are each one in a billion, so when you put the two of you together, there is absolutely no other couple like you! I respect your singularity and will help you recognize what is actually very special about the two of you together, as well as what needs adjusting.
Often things have gotten way out of balance, and each party sees things in their own way - one of the major challenges we all face is how to both voice our own perspective and hear the point of view of the other person.
Having children is most often a major, major series of events that changes the relationship and pushes it way out of balance. Everyone knows this - some work consciously and openly to maintain their closeness - many do not.
There are a lot of other dynamics we can talk about - let me give you some information about how I work with couples, though. First, I see the couple together, then I have one visit with each of them. This give an opportunity to speak as openly as possible about how each person sees the situation. Then we meet together again, and I give my initial impressions and recommendations. When it looks workable, we continue with couple sessions. Sometimes, it appears necessary for one or both parties to seek some individual therapy at the same time that we continue couple work. It can be enormously helpful for each person to have individual attention and assistance - this helps speed the work and deepen the understanding. The individual therapy is with someone else, not with me. Most of the time people find their own individual therapist, if not there are some I can recommend for you. When individual therapy is not necessary or not workable, I'll meet with each person individually at times, to get more into what they are feeling and helping them see that they do have more options.
If you want fewer arguments, more passion and intimacy, better communication and just a better feeling together, call me - 609 841 9159